emotional toll

I am sorry I have not been updating everyone like I should. I am at my emotional limit. This has taken a toll on me emotionaly, more than I ever would have thought possible. I am the kind of person who can sit and literally think about what's going on for an hour. Just be in a complete daze. Thinking about what's going on. My mind will start to wonder and I start to think about all the possibilities of the future, and then I snap out of it sick to my stomach with all of my finger nails gone. Literally, ask anyone who knows me well. And lately my nails have been bleeding if u get my drift. I find it hard just to wake up each morning and find out any update. But I have to remind myself that jenny is going through a lot worse. Fifty times worse.


Ok to answer everyones questions.....jenny's colon has ripped which is part of her intestines. Not her bowel like we thought at first. Its her colon. It has ripped in a spot they can not get to. They can not make another incision and cut into her stomach. She is burnt to badly where the skin is still healing and won't be able to sew back together, also her abdominal wall is too weak. Also her body has done what it can to protect itself. Her organs have hardened some to protect them from further damage. So that makes it impossible for them to move her organs to fix something else. Because of where the tear is and because of how her body is this makes it impossible for the surgeons to fix the tear. So they have put in two two things that are suctioning the bile as it drains from t

the tear in her colon. They are doing surgery every other day to clean her inside and Clean what the suctions missed. They are also seeing if the hole gets smaller, bigger or if her colon rips at another spot. She is not able to eat nor drink and have put in a pic line to feed her fluids and the nutrients she needs.

So that is what is going on right now. But unlike before she is awake and completely coherent for it all. I just can't believe this has all happened. This is horrible. To sit here and watch what this is doing to each member of my family including jenny has been hard. I feel like I absorb everyone Else's feelings and stresses around me. I know everyone is worried about jenny. I am too. I apologize for being distant and not as informing as I have been. I am going to try to update this every day.

jenny angels window stickers have come in. If you want one let me know. They are ten dollars. All money will go into her benefit fund.

To send jen a e greeting go to memorial Hermann's site click on patients tab. Enter her name. She is in room 333 in smicu. She is at the hospital in the medical center.