Thursday, February 23, 2012

Are y'all still there?

I am just reading some of the blogs that were posted and reading the comments that have been linked to them. I hope y'all are still there bc honestly I need this blog and y'all's support more than ever. Please spread the word that I am on and y'all will be hearing a lot from me. It has been such a hard journey and at times I did feel very alone...I always heard about how much support I had out there/ but now for the first time I can see with my own two eyes and I can actually comprehend that there was always someone out there when I needed someone the most. I struggled alot and I still do struggle with my post traumatic stress disorder...so I want everyone to understand that it wasn't that I didn't want visitors or that I didn 't want to communicate, I was simply overwhelmed by everything and ANYTHING...there was a period of time where I would have a suffocating feeling if there were more than 3 people in the room. It was hard enough to deal with all the doctors, nurses, therapists and all of the BOBS in between...that had to be in there to care for me...I just was terrified of adding anyone else into the mix. But for the majority of the time I was far too ill to have visitors. For the longest time no one could enter the room I was in without sc rubbing down and being concealed in paper gowns, breathing mask, and hair net of some sort. It was intense to say the least. But y'all please understand that I was not in any position to have visitors for many other complicated reasons. I was burned badly on over 50% of my body, so try to imagine the pain I was in as my skin tore and fell apart...then there were the many skin infections that kept laid up in a hospital bed basically naked with open wounds and tubes adorning my crispy skin. Not a pretty picture. But I am very willing and eager to share with yall some of the most intimate details of this nightmarish period of my life. I need y'all's support now more than ever bc you can only imagine the discomfort I am feeling now as I am becoming more aware of everything that has happaned and I am taking a chance by reaching out to y'all/ Totally out of my comfort zone, but as with all things in my recovery with pain comes progress. So if anyone is still there please respond...ask questions or whatever it is that you want to do...i just need you.

10 comments:

brittney jackson said...

Hey girl just read your post and want to thank you for sharing your heart! So glad you are recovering from the worst of it but know there are still hard days ahead. Praying for you! You are not alone!!!

Brittney Irvine Jackson

Rebecca said...

Hi Jenny,

This is the first time I have commented on your blog, but I have been reading about your recovery, and keeping you in my prayers. I am a fellow Aggie, and heard about your accident from a friend. I have your blog linked to an rss reader, and was surprised to see your post pop up yesterday after such a long time. I am glad to hear you are doing better, although still dealing with the repercussions of such a traumatic injury and recovery. Congratulations on coming so tremendously far, and keep it up.

Best wishes,

Rebecca

Ashlee Currid said...

Hey Jenny!
I am sorry that I haven't seen you in a long time...I understand about needing time/space to adapt to everything in the last few years. I am living in Austin now but I still think about you and your recovery, always hoping for the best!I know we lost touch a while back but, I just want you to know that I am here for you if you need me. Please feel free to call or come visit anytime 281-433-2007. Anytime girl!

Ashlee said...

Hey Jenny!
I am sorry that I haven't seen you in a long time...I understand about needing time/space to adapt to everything in the last few years. I am living in Austin now but I still think about you and your recovery, always hoping for the best!I know we lost touch a while back but, I just want you to know that I am here for you if you need me. Please feel free to call or come visit anytime 281-433-2007. Anytime girl!

Anonymous said...

You have so many supportive people for you! I love you very much and it makes me so happy your on your blog now. you have come so farand it will keep getting better for you! You know ill always be here for you. Xoxo

Anonymous said...

We love u Jenny and I've been following this since I found out about your accident and would check it daily for updates. So happy to see that you've taken over and are able to read everything. Hang in there doll
Helga

Anonymous said...

Aw honey! I'm so glad you are feeling more like reaching out now. Everyone understood I think that you wanted and needed privacy right after the accident. You definitely have support. Things at Uop have changed a lot but I will tell everyone you are online now. Stay strong! HUGS!!! Marie Rose

Anonymous said...

We're all still here. Hang in there.

alex said...

Thinking of you Jenny!

The Hardin Household said...

Think of you and your family often. Always in my daily prayers.